#39: Lower Your Standards
Hey friends,
We all aim to stay motivated, improve and become better versions of ourselves. To achieve this, we need to set standards that are accurate and calibrated to our true abilities. Recently, I noticed at the end of the day, I usually beat myself up for what I could have done even though I already completed some of the goals I set for the day.
I learnt from this article that the standards I hold myself to are sometimes too high and unrealistic. Trying to achieve these high standards sets me up for failure and unhappiness. One of the ways we get into setting these high standards for ourselves is the planning fallacy. When we plan for the future, we see it from a zoomed-out view. This usually results in us not accounting for tiny details like mistakes, distractions, tiredness, and procrastination. We also don't account for things harder than expected. We often get disappointed when any of these things happen.
We tend to keep doing things that give us satisfaction and stay away from things that cause us guilt. There is a problem with setting higher standards than we can achieve. When we keep falling short of our standards, we keep having guilt, and this guilt generally keeps us away from achieving the goals we already set for ourselves. But if our goals are realistic and achievable, we get a feeling of satisfaction when we meet the standards. This feeling of satisfaction increases our motivation and keeps us aiming at our set goals.
To set realistic and achievable standards for ourselves, we need to understand progress tends to be continuous, not discrete. It is better to set standards that help us improve daily. Instead of setting high unrealistic standards, we can track our current progress so far and how good we are currently, then set standards that are slightly better than the day before. This way, we are making sure that the standards are within our ability and reach—they are not too low to make us complacent, and they are not too high that they become unachievable.
To avoid the unhappiness and guilt that comes with not reaching our standards, we need to make sure we set realistic and well-calibrated standards according to our ability. Instead of beating ourselves up for what we could not achieve, we can be happy with what we have already done.
Have a great week!
Daniel
My Favourite Things This Week
1 - YouTube - I keep adding books to my "read later" list, but I don't get to read them most of the time. Then I came across this video by Mark Bacon. He explained reasons we enjoyed reading books when we were kids and why we have lost interest in reading books now. He shared tips on how to gain this lost interest back. If you are interested in reviving your reading habits, watch the video here.
Notes of the Week
Quote of the Week
Most great achievements are made through a combination of steady application and sudden insight.
From The 80/20 Principle By Richard Koch. Resurfaced with Readwise.